Ch... ch... ch... changes

It's been a weird couple of months. But then mine is a weird life. I guess it is all par for the course when you are a bit of a 'different' person. And anyone who is involved in the arts/theatre is a bit 'different', don't let people tell you otherwise.

Let's see... a year ago I was teaching drama, not going out much, spending a lot of time at home, settled, planning on having a family within the next couple of years. I had lost touch with a lot of friends and had stopped doing theatre altogether. I was... well I guessed I thought I was content. Bored but content.

Then in summer I did 'The Merry Wives of Windsor', mainly because I had a good part and nothing else to do. I enjoyed it very much but went straight back into my old rut as soon as the run was over.

Then came 'Some Explicit Polaroids' and I can say that for the first time in ages, I felt alive again. I can't even begin to express what that play meant to me. Being on stage and doing so well in the part of Nadia; connecting with the rest of the cast, director and producer... well, it was magical. It felt right. I guess I could tentatively say that I was happy. And if you know me well, you know how difficult it is for me to admit that. I started going out again, rediscovered my old friends and made some fantastic new ones.Then, 'things' started happening. I won't say if they were good or bad because good things sometimes come out of bad ones and vice-versa. Maybe, it all started when I was bitten by a dog in September (sounds like the beginning of a joke or something but my hand was rather badly injured and I still bear the scars months later).

Then after the 2nd weekend of the play in October, I finished up in hospital and we had to cancel the 3rd weekend of 'Polaroids'. That nearly finished me off at the time, I was so disappointed. But the reason I was in hospital was actually way worse than the mere cancellation of three performances. Again, those of you who know me know what I went through. And I don't think that I have even started to deal with what happened. Maybe one day soon I will and that day is not going to be a good one.

Then my hubby gets offered a job in London and, after we discuss it, he accepts. It has been his dream for ages and I wouldn't dream of even thinking of stopping him. But it happened so fast and he left this week. I'm still in shock I think. I'm staying here at least for now. I have work, commitments, things to do. I can't, and don't, want to leave for now at least. Many of my friends think I am mad, but I actually do like it here! Maybe later, when hubby is settled (and making pots of money hehe)... but for now I am taking each day as it comes and not thinking too much of the future. But however I put it, things have changed. And I'm not too good with change. I have had to learn how to change the cats' litter for goodness sake, and have to wake up early to put the rubbish out tomorrow (both the hubby's domain till now)! We'll still be seeing quite a lot of each other - thank goodness for cheap flights and also for MSN live chat and a webcam - but basically, I have to re-learn how to live on my own and not really have anyone to rely on for a while.

Another set-back is that I was cast for a musical due to be put on in March... and have now been uncast. Long story. So i was quite at a loose end re: what to do with myself. Was scared I'd end up in my usual rut of work, home and work again. Then someone else offered me a part in a play in January but I had to decline due to scheduling difficulties.

Which brings me to now. The day I declined the part, I got a phone call with an offer to direct a play at St James next January/February after the original director had to drop out. And I said yes. I must be mad! I've only ever directed once, at the Manoel Theatre when I was a naive 20 year old (I actually turned 20 during rehearsals!) One of my actors was Victor Debono who acted alongside me in 'Polaroids'.. things really came full circle there!Anyhow, here I am, ready to have my first rehearsal as a director for a play called 'Audacity' tomorrow (link has not yet been updated). And boy am I terrified. I feel like such a fraud! "What do I know about directing?" is a question I ask myself at least 20 times a day. At least, I am lucky to have a cast i like and trust and plenty of experienced people (hello Chris Gatt!) to help me, I hope, apart from the support of my far-off hubby and friends of course!

I've also been cast in a play in March called 'Life x 3' and I'm really looking forward to that.

As I said... it's a heck of a weird life I live. It's also exciting in a way I guess. I dunno... we'll see.

Wish me luck!

Happy birthday to meeeeeeeeee.........

Tra la laaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! I'm 24... again.

For Athena (and Sha)

Kitties in a basket!









Overfed?! My cats?! As if!








Awww.... he looks just like a kitten!










Help!










I ONLY drink from the tap







Comfortable?!

London, here I come!

Sooooooooooo excited! The Pea, the Gatt and I are off to London for a week of... well, not sleeping at all if the Gatt snores as much as he says he does. We'll be there for the New Year - what fun! This all started because the Pea is in London right now, to watch (and hear) Paul Simon and to catch some shows. the Blonde and Stunning Friend (as the Blonde calls her) decided to hop on over there and meet her for the weekend.

Obviously, I can't just up and go abroad during term time so was a bit gutted that I couldn't join them. But then, a couple of weeks ago, I was on Gtalk with the Pea and she said, why don't we go over for New Year's? And true to my newfound 'seize the day and don't worry about the washing up' philosophy, I was, like, yay! The Gatt decided to join us, booked flight and accomodation and here we are!

My objectives - to shop of course hehehe! Also to watch Avenue Q which you'll be happy to note I am doing (with Sha who will be back in the UK by then) - very excited, can't wait! I fell in love with this musical as soon as I first heard the songs courtesy of the lovely Matt. I also want to watch Wicked, The Mousetrap and Spamalot. And I want at least one Starbucks coffee every day.

In other news, well, life has been pretty routine recently, especially since I am not involved in a production at the moment. I am dying to get back on stage. I definately will be doing a play in March/April and hopefully one in February/March as well. Adrian also recently sent me a script which blew my mind and I'm hoping he'll produce it asap because I think it would be just awesome.

In the absence of the Pea and the Blonde (humph!), I went out with Sha and some other theatre lovlies yesterday and had a brilliant night out drinking and discussing theatre. We all had some story to tell about embarassing moments on stage and it was a blast. Crawled home at about 3 am and woke up this morning at 9 am with a splitting headache which didn't bode well especially since I had a lot of writing and stuff to do. But it got better slowly and by about 5 pm I was ready thank goodness. But now I''m ready for bed... I'll just listen to Avenue Q one more time though!

The Good, the Bad & the Ugly

Sometimes something happens that just knocks you for six. For the past few years, I've had a very ordered life. I was in control of, well, practically everything I could be in control of. And then recently, something happened that took that 'control' out of my hands. I didn't like it. I still don't like it. It made me feel sad and upset and devastated and awful. I didn't think I could cope. But with the help of my ever-present circle of friends, I think I'll eventually be ok. But it's going to take time.

In the meantime, I'm trying to keep my mind off things by keeping myself as busy as I can. Doing things I enjoy so I can stop thinking. To that aim, yesterday I went to one hell of a party at the Blonde's place. The company yesterday was just amazing, the food really yummy and the booze... well, let's just say that there was more than enough of it. I really had a good time. I think all this going out, enjoying myself is some kind of defense mechanism to stop me feeling like shit. I did have a little cry on the Blonde's shoulder in her room for 2 minutes and she held my hand and gave me a big hug. As did practically everyone else at the party. I'm a lucky girl in this respect I guess.

Of course, every silver lining has a cloud and so this morning I woke up, after about four hours sleep, with the mother of all hangovers (for me anyway!) and a cold/hay fever which means blocked nose, sneezing, sore throat, the works. Oh well! Maybe I should go and have some rest before I have to face school tomorrow...